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so /u/limitless_0509 perhaps your wife hates you because you're a disgusting pig - curious if you had thought of that when making those r4r posts to cheat on her?

There are lots of reasons someone might do this. Some better than others. If you're interested, you might as well overlook it and just try texting her. If she doesn't want to answer, she won't. Not much to lose at this stage.

It seems like for whatever reason, she doesn’t want to be the one to text first. Could be a pride thing, maybe she has a boyfriend, there’s a ton of possibilities.

She wants you as a man to take the lead and ask her out. Maybe after a few dates, she will also take more initiative, and if it's a deal breaker for you, just make sure to mention it during your second or third date.

You're right that it objectively makes zero sense at all. But instead of guessing, just message her and get the answer you need. Good luck.

The short and long answer is yes

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Welcome to /r/relationship_advice. Please make sure you read our rules here. We'd like to take this time to remind users that:

• We do not allow any type of am I the asshole? or situations/content involving minors

• Any sort of namecalling, insults,etc will result in the comment being removed and the user being banned. (Including but not limited to: slut, bitch, whore, for the streets, etc. It does not matter to whom you are referring.)

• ALL advice given must be good, ethical advice. Joke advice or advice that is conspiratorial or just plain terrible will be removed, and users my be subject to a ban.

• No referencing hateful subreddits and/or their rhetoric. Examples include, but is not limited to: red/blue/black/purplepill, PUA, FDS, MGTOW, etc. This includes, but is not limited to, referring to people as alpha/beta, calling yourself or users "friend-zoned", referring to people as Chads, Tyrones, or Staceys, pick-me's, or pornsick. Any infractions of this rule will result in a ban. This is not an all-inclusive list.

• All bans in this subreddit are permanent. You don't get a free pass.

• What we cannot give advice on: rants, unsolicited advice, medical conditions/advice, mental illness, letters to an ex, "body counts" or number of sexual partners, legal problems, financial problems, situations involving minors, and/or abuse (violence, sexual, emotional etc). All of these will be removed and locked. This is not an all-inclusive list.

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There is a reason no one his age will date him. What an insufferable insecure douche.

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I think it’s very common to want or get a pic with a gift so don’t think you’re out of line. As a woman I’d say you got played. She’s either got a bf or husband but probably has a few guys sending her gifts. She probably doesn’t have the shoes anymore. Probably sold them. That’s why she is so adamant about not sending the pic. She’s gaslighting and manipulating you. Be glad you found out before you got in deeper. I’m sorry you got mistreated and ripped off.

I don’t even want the shoes back. She can have it as it was supposed to be a gift for her. The response that I got for something so simple was just dumbfounding

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Honestly you’re coming across as a bit needy. It’s been four months, you’re both young, he wants to enjoy having his own life. There really isn’t anything wrong with that, a healthy relationship involves respecting that you’re each still individuals. If you value the relationship then give him some breathing space, you want to compliment his life not take it over. Discuss setting aside certain times for being a couple - FaceTime every other evening, set up when you plan on physically being together, if you can’t call then text. His blatant lack of response to your texts so far at some points has been a bit shitty (provided you aren’t spamming him); if you think after a while that you’re no longer compatible in what you both want in a relationship then move on.

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Did you tell her marriage was has a transactional expectation as well...

> She mentioned that that was a transactional gift and I gifted her the shoes to get something in return

Actually if she kept the sneakers without you getting your side of a transaction, that breaks the transactional contract...reclaim those shoes. had she modeled said shoes, you would no longer have any legal standing to reclaim the merchandise, as she would have completed her end of the transaction concluding the business and legally laying claim to said shoes. Make sure your marriage contract is solid. This one seems like they want to rig the property in her favor, through legal trickery.

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OP don’t do this. Horrible idea.

…be friends with her?

If you confessed to her, you obviously like her company right? And given that she wants to talk with you, she likes your company too. Yes, it’s going to be a bit awkward at first, but is your pride really worth losing a friend you care about?

Welcome to /r/relationship_advice. Please make sure you read our rules here. We'd like to take this time to remind users that:

• We do not allow any type of am I the asshole? or situations/content involving minors

• Any sort of namecalling, insults,etc will result in the comment being removed and the user being banned. (Including but not limited to: slut, bitch, whore, for the streets, etc. It does not matter to whom you are referring.)

• ALL advice given must be good, ethical advice. Joke advice or advice that is conspiratorial or just plain terrible will be removed, and users my be subject to a ban.

• No referencing hateful subreddits and/or their rhetoric. Examples include, but is not limited to: red/blue/black/purplepill, PUA, FDS, MGTOW, etc. This includes, but is not limited to, referring to people as alpha/beta, calling yourself or users "friend-zoned", referring to people as Chads, Tyrones, or Staceys, pick-me's, or pornsick. Any infractions of this rule will result in a ban. This is not an all-inclusive list.

• All bans in this subreddit are permanent. You don't get a free pass.

• What we cannot give advice on: rants, unsolicited advice, medical conditions/advice, mental illness, letters to an ex, "body counts" or number of sexual partners, legal problems, financial problems, situations involving minors, and/or abuse (violence, sexual, emotional etc). All of these will be removed and locked. This is not an all-inclusive list.

If you have any questions, please send us a modmail.

#This is an automatic comment that appears on all posts. This comment does not necessarily mean your post violates any rules.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

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