Is that a Supra?!

Ah, gotcha. I actually don't believe that to be true, personally, as far as what "dressing well" entails. Heck, when I was growing up, it felt like my thick hair only wanted to do one thing; look like a 70's porno commercial. Back on topic though, as a black man, there's certain styles that look more professional than other styles. Same with white men, or any other race. Fortunately, hair style is getting less 'taboo' and we can focus more on other outward justifiers. But, 20 years ago, the standards were more strict, and that was for everyone, including me.

They're Teslas. It's like trying to differentiate a dentist's waiting room from a dermatologist's waiting room. That said, yeah you'd still have to be pretty out of it not to notice.

I unlocked another person's vw rabbit with my key once.

I've seen plenty of black people with corn rows that present well.. I've seen plenty of white people with corn rows that present thuggish..

But I'm different, I've dressed thuggish before and was never a thug so I don't look at the outfit and make judgments like that, it would be more your stance, tone of voice, movements in shoulder postering that would give me a 1st impression of if you are a thug or not..

But 1st impressions are a thing and it's not a racist thing.. It's how you present that is going to make someone feel a certain way about you..

The double standard comes from dressing well means conforming to things your hair isn’t capable of naturally.

Thug hasn’t changed. Any thing outside what I stated had negative connotations to it. Large Afros are often seen as aggressive and militant. Afro puffs childish. You can pick any historical black hairstyle and there have been negative associations with it.

As for what they should have been teaching him. One educate themselves first. Realize their bias. As for teaching, be yourself. End of day he was a child and it was his hair. Hair is one of the few things children actually have some control of in their lives and they should be allowed to express themselves. My self perception got immeasurably better when the barber kicked my mom out of my haircuts.

And to be fair bias is not a white or black thing. I got it from both sides. One of my teachers great educator helped drive and foster my love of technology. Also once said it’s to bad I didn’t get that good hair from your momma. She didn’t mean anything negative by it. At that time straighter hair was still seen as an overall positive in the black community.

His parents isolating from his culture casually would have had impact. Intentional or not.

There's no double standard. I put the same standard on anyone: dress well and speak well.

I appreciate your input, but I disagree on one thing you mentioned: "His parents may have been trying to teach a lesson, but they taught the wrong one." I'm speculating slightly (based on what was written) that his parents were trying to teach him to not "look like a thug" (quoting them), and while the definition behind that has changed, it's still something that I believe is correct to teach, regardless of race. Cindi Lauper in the 80's (white girl) would buzz one side of her hair, and that was considered taboo at the time. But let's go back to your statement that I quoted; what lesson do you believe the parents should have been teaching instead?

That's the same as my luggage!

Let's go to the 90s. We had just bought a brand new Nissan yesterday. First new car the family ever had (everything else was used) thanks to Unky's job at Nissan and the company discount. We walk out of Ross, click the unlock on the fob (ooo! Neat new feature!), open the door, sit down, and get ready to drive away. Look around. This doesn't look correct. Look right, there's a woman absolutely dumbfounded staring at me through the window. I look down. Shit. This isn't our car.

Thank gouda we don't live in Texas we mighta got shot. We got out, apologized, clicked the beeper and our car (right next to the one we got in what with that identical exterior trim) beeped. I like living where people are chill with honest mistakes.

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Not well said at all. Just really doubled down on the double standard.

The problem is 20 years ago white folks could wear the same hairstyles and not be viewed as unprofessional just coming back from vacation. There were also many other black hairstyles that were seen unprofessional. You pretty much had low and tight if you were a guy, or straightened as a woman.

His parents may have been trying to teach a lesson, but they taught the wrong one.

Souce: half black half white guy who heard similar things from their white mother. Little older then Colin.

Right? Like, I've walked up to another car that was the same model as mine, but immediately noticed that it had none of my decorations, and then saw mine a few spots down.

Before Christ man?

What's the line between "we have a lot to learn and make mistakes" to just being bad and racist as you seem to suggest his parents were.

I think a lot of people would like to learn more, would like to hurt less, would like to help more, but there's such a desire in society to just drunk on people and brand them as something bad so venturing out in that towards kind of thing is just super risky.

Or is the lesson here that adoptive parents should stick with their own race so their mistakes, whether reasonable or not, don't harm the kids, and don't involve the parents being forever labeled as racists decades later.

I know immediately if someone's sat in my car. I would for sure know I was in the wrong car.

I see. Shall we to business then, Fang?

Stupid movie, but that was a dope fight scene!

Arguably they provided absolutely nothing regarding this story being outright fake. Definitely should be treated with caution, but that isn't the same as making the claim "this story is fake."

TIL that parents wanting their son NOT to look like a thug is a bad thing :( WTAF?

This reminds me of the time the British dropped a wooden bomb on a Nazi airfield full of decoy planes.

Yeah but cornrows are seen as “thuggish” by white people rather than black people (largely). It’s pretty much the centuries old debate of what makes “good hair” which is largely shaped by the dominant white culture.

So do you think cornrows make a black person look like a thug?

Well said, Bender3455 :)