Recent comments in /f/nottheonion
mr_oof t1_jbg04y3 wrote
Reply to An anime actress with nearly 1 million Twitter followers tweeted out a guide telling her fans to bathe before coming to her concert by JayBaggins
prepare wash your anus!
_BellatorHalliRha_ t1_jbfz4i1 wrote
Reply to comment by captain_chocolate in VIDEO: Dangerous wild cat on cocaine captured in Ohio neighborhood by msnmck
It's pretty funny
Rocketsloth t1_jbfz4e7 wrote
Reply to An anime actress with nearly 1 million Twitter followers tweeted out a guide telling her fans to bathe before coming to her concert by JayBaggins
Honestly, that's great advice. I just wish Insane Clown Posse would follow her example. Faygo is not deodorant.
artful_nails t1_jbfxzj7 wrote
Reply to Scientists have revived a ‘zombie’ virus that spent 48,500 years frozen in permafrost by SelectiveSanity
Just great. Next they'll crossbreed it with Rabies and Covid-19. Maybe a bit of Ebola for that 28 ___ Later look?
BoinkBoinkEtAliae t1_jbfxy56 wrote
Reply to comment by TheStolllessHawk in Scientists have revived a ‘zombie’ virus that spent 48,500 years frozen in permafrost by SelectiveSanity
No the apes would just take over and build a religious quasi-military society
tinymonesters t1_jbfwttz wrote
Reply to comment by Schrecht in 'No foul' play in death of Georgia man found wrapped in rug in Baton Rouge by kangarooturd
That is a profoundly stupid quote.
stillfumbling t1_jbfw8in wrote
Reply to Home Ministry of Malaysia seizes sex toys due to fears they "can erode morals, public order and national safety", pose for photo with contraband. by Sombre_Ombre
Is that guy casually holding a magnum butt plug??
g3t_int0_ityuh t1_jbfw1am wrote
Reply to Scientists have revived a ‘zombie’ virus that spent 48,500 years frozen in permafrost by SelectiveSanity
Covid-23 starting soon?
VampireLesbiann OP t1_jbfvj1a wrote
Reply to comment by [deleted] in Chinese embassy denies racism in blackface skit by VampireLesbiann
How does your sentiment stand when it was Africans in Africa who were offended by this and were trying to "hold China accountable"? Nobody in America or the rest of the West cared.
And this show was supposed to celebrate African-Chinese friendship, which is the entire reason why Africans got mad
weaselmaster t1_jbfvb9n wrote
Reply to NASA fixes spacecraft by turning it off and on again — 'Firemode reset' sees Interstellar Boundary Explorer back on the job by Cosmicking04
“Firemode reset”? sounds like someone spent an awful lot of time to make up a new word for reboot.
SnooStories6404 t1_jbfv4ma wrote
culb77 t1_jbfunbu wrote
Reply to Fairfax County Board of Supervisors vote in favor of giving themselves a massive raise by Pantherax_k
To be fair, Fairfax County is one of the highest COL places in the US, 50% more than average. The median home price is $650k. So it's not completely unreasonable that they need to raise the salary of the position to match the area.
Note: I don't live there, but have relatives who do. We considered moving there, but even making $150k per year we could not afford it. It's very expensive.
SelectiveSanity OP t1_jbfug9o wrote
Reply to comment by DebiMoonfae in Scientists have revived a ‘zombie’ virus that spent 48,500 years frozen in permafrost by SelectiveSanity
Don't be ridiculous.
​
Its the beginning of a popular 90s TV series about aliens getting its own feature film, movie.
Citizen-Kang t1_jbfuc5q wrote
Reply to NASA fixes solar observation spacecraft by turning it off and turning it on again by Byzantium
That's 50% of IT work. "Have you tried turning it off and turning it back on?" I'm a programmer, but I can't even tell you how many times I've asked that when my folks call me about a random computer issue or my wife asks me why such and such isn't working. Most of the time, I'm not at all interested in what the actual problem is, I'm only interested in the resolution.
DebiMoonfae t1_jbfsxjs wrote
Reply to Scientists have revived a ‘zombie’ virus that spent 48,500 years frozen in permafrost by SelectiveSanity
Whyyy??
That’s the beginning of a zombie movie .
Edit: a letter because i always end up typing if when trying to type of .
Phillyredsox t1_jbfsdz9 wrote
Reply to Scientists have revived a ‘zombie’ virus that spent 48,500 years frozen in permafrost by SelectiveSanity
Someone lick it and let’s hurry this along.
redheadedwoodpecker t1_jbfrzfp wrote
[deleted] t1_jbfrywe wrote
Reply to comment by TranscendentPretzel in VIDEO: Dangerous wild cat on cocaine captured in Ohio neighborhood by msnmck
[removed]
N3onknight t1_jbfrhg5 wrote
Reply to comment by HowBoutaLittlePiss in NASA fixes solar observation spacecraft by turning it off and turning it on again by Byzantium
And percussive maintenance
chilipalmer99 t1_jbfrfed wrote
Has anyone checked on Hillary's alibi at the time of the "suicide"?
tanthonyS t1_jbfqnpr wrote
Reply to comment by natalie_mf_portman in 'No foul' play in death of Georgia man found wrapped in rug in Baton Rouge by kangarooturd
I guess we agree that it was a pretty poorly worded release of info.
Notsnowbound t1_jbfpzpt wrote
Reply to An anime actress with nearly 1 million Twitter followers tweeted out a guide telling her fans to bathe before coming to her concert by JayBaggins
"Release the firetrucks full of warm, soapy water!"
Nuker-79 t1_jbfptvv wrote
Reply to Scientists have revived a ‘zombie’ virus that spent 48,500 years frozen in permafrost by SelectiveSanity
Here we go again……
Brotherwolf2 t1_jbfpo0a wrote
Reply to comment by Shadows802 in Man who calls himself "Dolphin Dave" cited for allegedly harassing humpback whales and dolphins in Hawaii by wallstreetegg
If in the metaphor they were a large elephant...
UpDog1966 t1_jbg0rz7 wrote
Reply to Oklahoma votes against legalizing recreational marijuana by agonhaziri
They are used to leaving the state all the time.