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This ain’t all shits and giggles!

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>This is going to sound extremely fucked up, but he and you need to forget it. You cannot stop them on your own.

Found the voyagers alt account

The imagery of holding your breath in silence and then rippin’ a loud fart that attracts a bathroom demon? Hilarious. Love this.

You know what they say: Man door hand hook car door.

I'm assuming the house blew up because the stove had some kind of gas leak and she had a candle burning, but I don't know for sure? Overall so good. Gave me chills

Candy is even more of a rush than murder

This is terrifying, OP. Right now, your best bet is to wait till daybreak, because if you try to leave the flat with your baby, your wife and the thing with her will definitely notice. And just like the TV turns on by itself, there's no guarantee that the door will not lock itself just when you need to leave. Just tell your wife you'll go back to bed for now.

Your face WOULD HURT, after something like that... I wouldn't have been able to really contain my own laughter, letting him leave without winding the grandfather clock like that. The line you delivered about not really sparing him, I wouldn't have been able to keep a straight... FACE! HA! Which I suppose you didn't! Really, you've got a sharp wit, my friend.

Exactly, somehow lock it back in

Do you happen to frequent r/NissanDrivers? I think you’d enjoy it

This is going to sound extremely fucked up, but he and you need to forget it. You cannot stop them on your own. It is a road that can only lead to one thing. Cut off the scar, and try your best to move on. Never take that substance, distance yourself from it completely. At this time you as well as the OP’s safety should be top priority. Don’t die attempting to be a hero. Some doors are best left unopened.

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But the Voyagers will still be out there. I’m gonna need OP to solve this before I’m affected.

I know… why not fuck over a boss you hate or something? Or Henry Kissinger? (Ok, that would be hard, but still, so goddamn lazy)

Stella is a selfish bitch and deserved it.

Have you watched deep space 9? Your dad might be correct, a symbiote might not kill Matthew, though it would likely change him. In the series, the trill species has a relationship with a worm-like symbiotic species, though they generally fuse as adults, not children. The host's personality combines with the symbiote's personality, instead of erasing it.

I'd also recommend reading the Parasitology trilogy by Mira Grant (sorry for the offensive name). Depending on how it works, maybe you could find a way to lay eggs in humans with unrecoverable brain damage. That way your species could survive without erasing a person, if it turns out that's what happens.

Maybe start or join a support group for people afraid of water and try to get other information from people like you.

Either way, I think you're a great dad and a good person, good luck :)

Well done sir xxx not everyone can do what you are doing xxx we owe you the world for keeping us safe xxx

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I suspect most people, if they met their younger selves, would give them a knock upside the head if they could...

Well that was a fever dream. A good one. I'm not even one hundred percent sure I understand, but I definitely enjoyed the trip.

I suspected as such, but I wasn’t completely sure. Still, there’s so much time between then (and old you and young you certainly act differently from one another), that you may as well be different people. Old you should have slapped young you for being a knucklehead.

Another rule to abide by to survive in the Southeast Asian jungle: never look back.

My grandfather was in the military and did a bunch of long-range jungle patrols during the Insurgency years. He doesn't talk about it much but he says there's a code every member of the patrol has to abide by before "trespassing into the realm of the others".

My understanding of "every rule wrong" is that he meant "wrong" not in the sense of "incorrect" but in the sense of, "wrong by their very existence." Wrong like how the gardener is wrong. It just shouldn't be in our world, and is an abomination even if you never look at it. But I agree it is a confusing wording. I think he was simply trying to scare people away.

Also, I may not have written this clearly enough. My face still hurts and the painkillers probably affected my clarity in completing this. Especially since I started this post such a very, very long time ago (days for you, a century for me). Maybe I should have added an endnote or something, but I am both Pim Perrin and Sam Miller. I pulled my (younger) self out of the bone closet. 26 year old me started this account and 126 year old me finished it. My face hurts very much right now...