KorgX3 t1_jed0uco wrote on March 31, 2023 at 2:55 AM

Reply to comment by OJSimpsons in A buddy took a picture of this sign at Pax East by sidarv

I had that last week, now I'm shitting out rough beasts slouching towards Bethlehem.

sqeeky_wheelz t1_jed0tq0 wrote on March 31, 2023 at 2:55 AM

Reply to My friend sent me this from an oil conference by heinzhinesheinz

I like to think the advertising person was disgruntled and took a new job right before the conference.

PoyGuiMogul t1_jed0hla wrote on March 31, 2023 at 2:53 AM

Reply to I’m offended, instructions unclear by LaisyDucky

" Then you're probably an artist bothered by the negative space. "

zeradragon t1_jed0h29 wrote on March 31, 2023 at 2:52 AM

Reply to This birthday card display is a bit insensitive… by proximalfunk

It's 60/70/80/70 then Adios Amigo, I've found the secret to reverse aging!

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Reply to Saw this on the job site.. by JetLife93

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Klepto666 t1_jed0d0g wrote on March 31, 2023 at 2:51 AM

Reply to comment by Alkill1000 in The warranty for my new soap dispenser. by Boiling_Frustration

I consider it unnecessary, BUT have you ever seen a touch soap dispenser actually used for awhile? It gets NASTY. It's not even easy to wash off, and sometimes it's in crevices that you can't really wash if you wanted to keep it for longer.

[deleted] t1_jed0cn5 wrote on March 31, 2023 at 2:51 AM

Reply to He wanted to know if it was offered as a main course 😒 by Booshida

[deleted]

Erick2142 t1_jed02fi wrote on March 31, 2023 at 2:49 AM

Reply to My friend sent me this from an oil conference by heinzhinesheinz

So I noticed his right arm a lot bigger and then noticed he was using that laser distance measurer on tripod indoors before I got to the mistake

Something's wrong with me.

Acktion69 t1_jed01ps wrote on March 31, 2023 at 2:49 AM

Reply to A buddy took a picture of this sign at Pax East by sidarv

Never push a fart.

denimdeamon t1_jeczu5d wrote on March 31, 2023 at 2:47 AM

Reply to These two had way too much fun dressing up and posing by EndersGame_Reviewer

I absofuckinglutley love this.

Klepto666 t1_jeczphi wrote on March 31, 2023 at 2:46 AM

Reply to This birthday card display is a bit insensitive… by proximalfunk

I mean either it's dark comedy, or the card involves something about saying goodbye to the 80s and welcoming the 90s. We conveniently don't have the context.

YoloIsNotDead t1_jeczpb9 wrote on March 31, 2023 at 2:46 AM

Reply to comment by KorgX3 in My friend sent me this from an oil conference by heinzhinesheinz

*But not on Thundayth

GreenrabbE99 t1_jeczjuo wrote on March 31, 2023 at 2:45 AM

Reply to My friend sent me this from an oil conference by heinzhinesheinz

That's not ritgh...

No_Construction_6146 t1_jeczj6b wrote on March 31, 2023 at 2:45 AM

Reply to This birthday card display is a bit insensitive… by proximalfunk

It’s the truth

pac-men t1_jeczi7e wrote on March 31, 2023 at 2:44 AM

Reply to My friend sent me this from an oil conference by heinzhinesheinz

Jhonny Peralta has entered the chat.

PoyGuiMogul t1_jeczhz3 wrote on March 31, 2023 at 2:44 AM

Reply to Going to need a bigger doggy door. by ArmChairAnalyst86

" PAWS " a horror by Steven Spielberg. This summer, find out exactly " who let the dogs out. "

Thick_Apricot8820 t1_jecyxhn wrote on March 31, 2023 at 2:40 AM

Reply to comment by WoodBoogerSpork in Woman embarrassed by child on zoom meeting by battylol

You the most bitch of all then!

merdub t1_jecyx5x wrote on March 31, 2023 at 2:40 AM

Reply to comment by MotherRam in The warranty for my new soap dispenser. by Boiling_Frustration

Yeah this is why I also like the faucets with the wave/tap feature, I can just touch it with my forearm and not get everything full of raw chicken juice.

andymorphic t1_jecytt3 wrote on March 31, 2023 at 2:39 AM

Reply to I remember when…. by Kaa_The_Snake

now its a bullet proof vest.

ZorroMeansFox t1_jecyqx4 wrote on March 31, 2023 at 2:38 AM

Reply to My friend sent me this from an oil conference by heinzhinesheinz

That's a brilliant extension of the effect which is seen in Cunningham's Law.

Luissmb t1_jecymz2 wrote on March 31, 2023 at 2:37 AM

Reply to Delicacy from around the world by armance83

This just gave me a headache and a laugh. Could not process it fast enough.

LucindaStreets t1_jecymiw wrote on March 31, 2023 at 2:37 AM

Reply to Just leave the pizza behind the hedge. by denodster

Badass bush!

Central_Control t1_jecy8ye wrote on March 31, 2023 at 2:34 AM

Reply to comment by yell_worldstar in Gets down on knees...to pray by InconsistentResident

Of course they do. They know exactly what they're putting on that sign. How fucking stupid do you think that they'd have to be not to get that joke? It's an extremely simple joke. Simple enough for children to understand.

Because priests prey on children. They always have. They always will. Nothing has changed.

Wouldtick t1_jecy7jv wrote on March 31, 2023 at 2:34 AM

Reply to comment by ReadingFromTheShittr in A guy in my city has been walking around with a seagull and is very proud of it. by SaintsNick94

You can pet a gull’s eardrums, but never hear a seabird that is someone’s pet.

TwelveInchBic t1_jecy2vf wrote on March 31, 2023 at 2:33 AM

Reply to Little ones and big ones, I hear by bitNine

This actually explains the quality of service in my town.

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