Fold it up and put it in your ass cheeks but change it to "We've been trying to reach you about your cars extended warranty"

Last gas for 50 miles

“Hello there.”

"We've been trying to reach you regarding your car's extended warranty."

Sledgehammer. Chainsaw. A car.

Any of those will do…

Make a "Remove tab before using" label (like toys with batteries have) and then tuck it partially in your ass before going in.

Then they can remove it, and it won't potentially fuck up your results

It will be unreadable & tangled up

"This end down"

If they're scoping you, then they've already met thy end when they put the camera up it.

You should make a miniature version of Chester Copperpot's wallet instead.

Put it like where a tramp stamp would go or just have someone write it in pen 😂

How about "Inspected by No. 44"

Brilliant. I’m going to see if I can fit this on a plastic label called edits

Use thy where you would use your and thine where you would use yours. BUT: if the noun placed after thy begins with a vowel sound, use thine instead: thy book, but thine eyes. Archaically, the same was done with my and mine, but this is no longer common usage outside of some poetic use.

Turn back, there be dragons beyond!

Help, I’m stuck inside of a human!

It should say, "Prepare to meet MY end"

*thine

The light at the end of the tunnel.

He could move into those boots and start a family with old mother Hubbard

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Inconceivable!!!

Just stick it on your ass. My luck, the tape would cause a false reading and I’d have to prep all over again, pass. ( no pun intended)

do not open

A QC note left by aliens from last probing. Next probe due in 9 light years or 69k miles

“Want a tour of the place?”