People describe me as one the the most extroverted people they know and I find a bar a bit intimidating mostly due to lack of structure.

Have you considered something more structured - like going to Havana Club near central for bachata / salsa lessons followed by a dance social?

Super beginner friendly, you rotate people in lessons so you can socialize with a dance partner and then rotate afterwards. Great to meet people, but also great that after each song / rotation you can gracefully exit.

I found a wonderful community with the social dance scene - after a while you’ll see some familiar faces.

As for socializing with strangers with while having anxiety - I recommend almost having some “questions” in your back pocket that you can ask them to break the ice.

This is a stupid comment. There isn't a single mixed use or full on dog park in Cambridge that doesn't allow people without dogs to go visit. Can you name any in the Boston area at all even?

1369!

I mean, he's always been cool to me. Ymmv.

I certainly can’t speak for all of them, but a lot of parks don’t allow people without dogs to use them. But, if you have a friendly dog, this would be my top choice too :^)

Bartenders at shine square pub are super nice. You can sit at the bar there by yourself, chat with them casually, and talk to strangers if you want.

Yes agree. Soooo many restaurants and night activities like that too, likely more economical in some areas as well, compared to Camb or Boston

Honestly I'd try a dog park, you can make small chat with the owners and if you need to bail on a convo you can just pet some dogs.

Simon’s

Allston and Brookline are great, too. The commute to Cambridge could be a bit longer though.

The Cambridge Common has super nice bartenders!

Ymmv but i found that “having a job “ was really useful. Like you have a predetermined reason to talk to folks. I was sort of Shanghaied into doorknocking during the 2016 elections to remind people to vote. I didn’t want to do it initially because I had pretty bad social anxiety back then but I found that it really made a huge difference — talking to folks and basically being able to displace whatever that person was sending my way towards the operation I was a part of rather than myself sort of let me off the hook of self judgement.

That aside, I still find bars kind of intimidating. I miss my hometown pub; it was a very low pressure environment with a bunch of patio chairs outside where people either kept to themselves or optionally joined in with the folks next to them, either was 100% ok. Haven’t found anything like that here yet.

Go to Atwood's Tavern. You can strike up a conversation with anyone at the bar, they are all friendly.

I would second doing a more structured activity. I feel pretty comfortable in most social situations and I have a hard time going to bars alone. Maybe try one that has live music? That way you have an activity to occupy yourself with and an easy way to strike up a conversation with someone if that's what you're looking for. I really enjoy the Burren early on a weeknight. Sometimes I'll bring a book or my laptop and just hang out after work, before it gets too crowded.

A little off the redline is the highland kitchen a great bar to sit by your self and maybe read a book or listen to the jukebox and maybe strike up a conversation

Theyre weirdly rude. It wasn't awful i think its kind of an act, but i wouldn't recommend it given your original post. The Druid is great, New Republik is pretty solid, Thirsty Scholar too. All in Inman Square. If you enjoy video games, Roxys aka 4rcade in Central sq. Is pretty solid too for a relatively friendly vibe and you can get some good grilled cheese too

Well that sounds like a bar. So you’re looking for a place with some hubbub, but not too crowded and noisy, and you’d also like to have some conversations with strangers.

The Druid is a well known Irish bar in Inman Square. You might find that enjoyable. And the Irish are known to be quite the conversationalists.

You could try a skip the small talk event for a more structured environment!

I think saloon in Davis could be nice. Haven’t been in years (I struggle with something similar) but seems like a good goal cause it’s dark in there and easier to feel more intimate (vs chaotic)

My personal experience there has been the exact opposite. In fact, one of the reasons I like going there is that the staff is super friendly. Bummer to hear others have had poor experiences there though

The bartender with the mustache at the Plow is a bonafide dickhead. Absolute fucking prick. Give that place a miss.

The ability to carry on with strangers and to get used to the hubbub of a gathering place of people.

I really like Revival (Alewife and Davis locations)

I’m a therapist myself. I’m curious, why a bar? What’re you hoping to get out of the experience?

Reading reviews online and apparently the bartenders are rude, so I will have to skip it for now.